This is the Period of Resignation, and this is all there is.
So one inevitable consequence is that the anti-depressants and the painkillers have to go in the bin. I know my Quiz of Week recommended that I carry on taking the tablets, but I can't think of them as a way to get me through - because there is no "through".
Things are as they are, and I need to deal with that, face it head on. It was a coping strategy of sorts to think that the Period of Shittiness might pass in a hazy chemical blur, but now I need to get on with trying to live life as it is. There are to be no perks, or escapes; no magical interludes, or tenderness, or intimacy.
My hugs will be from my kids, and my girlfriends - that's a lot of warmth and kindness.
And the other stuff? The electric blue of kingfisher and dragonfly are woven into my fabric now.
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