Brainbox or Braindead?

Ladies, it appears we fall into two simple categories. No, not Tits Or Tushes, it's a different taxonomy.

The very use of the word taxonomy gives a clue about which group I might fall in to: Women Who Think Too Much. As opposed to the other group: Women Who Don't Think Enough.   Men also fall into two parallel categories, based around the type of woman they would prefer.

I bought my sister a self-help book once, actually, called Women Who Think Too Much. Perhaps some of us do have a tendency to over-analyse sometimes, but the only self-help book I've ever bought for myself was entitled Shut Up And Move On, which gives you a flavour of my general approach to life.

However, if you are a woman who is seldom troubled by thoughts of any kind, there is a new product on the market designed just for you. It's an eTablet for laydees, with a pretty pink background and pre-loaded with all the software you need (love that word, soft-ware, sounds like kittens and snowflakes and clothing all put together, mmmmm). Apps cover yoga, shopping lists, recipes, perfumes and weight charts, plus of course the indispensable technology to help you track the timing of your monthly visitor. How did we manage these things before? I have no idea, I can't remember (duh - women are like goldfish). 

This eTablet is for women who are "confused by technology", and therefore also good for women who have been lobotomised.  Personally speaking, I am continually confused by the bewildering array of rectangular things in my handbag. Are they all bars of chocolate? Is it a tiny teeny TV? I hear ringing and I hold the white rectangular thing up to my ear - oops, it's a pantyliner again. God, I'm always doing that. 

Like many conversations with women, there is a serious point somewhere within all this chatter. The pinkification of products, the dumbing-down of technology for a female audience, is really worrying.  It's an insidious, pernicious new variant of gender-discrimination and it's creeping in under the wire in the disguise of responding to consumers. Not just small gadgets either. If you want a really good laugh, have a look at Honda's new girl-car. Simply perfect. Comes in any colour you want, as long as it's pink.