Oh god. I feel really weird. I don't feel right at all. Just have no idea what I am doing or where I am heading. I feel like I am tumbling down a vortex of work. So tired I'm not really sleeping now. This can't carry on. It just can't.
I have not seen the plays in town, Only the computer printouts. I have not read the latest books, Only the Wall Street Journal. I have not heard a bird sing this year, Only the ringing of the phones. I have not taken a walk anywhere, But from the parking lot to my office. I have not shared a feeling in years, But my thoughts are known to all. I have not listened to my own needs, But what I want I get. I have not shed a tear in ages. I have arrived. Is this where I was going?
I was much further out than you thought, and not waving but drowning. Complicated, intense,stressed, tired. Difficult to get to know and hard to love. Rarely admit vulnerability - never accept help. Standing note to self: "must try harder".
No comments:
Post a Comment