Instructions for Living

Bollocks to all these self-help books. Adults have no bloody idea how to live their lives - just look at us, for heaven's sake. What a mess.

I am going to take all my advice from 6 year olds in future. Here is the instruction list two friends made.

How To Fall In Love

1. First you stare at the person.
2. You get close to each other.
3. You ask for a date.
4. You go to bed and do sex.
5. When you kiss you suck and lick.
6. Get nacked in bed and do more sex.
7. -
8. Go dance and put your noses together.
9. -
10. Then kiss forever.
11. Take a shower together and kiss.
12. Give each other rings.
13. Go to the pool together.

Yep. I think that has everything covered.  Steps 14-24 are blank - as they should be. It's all downhill after you get back from the pool.