Her Comes The Bride

How very Guardian. Here’s a piece about a girl who was so in love with herself she decided to marry herself.  As if reading this article wasn’t bad enough, I also suffered her being interviewed on the Today programme on Monday.  When you’ve finished laughing (at her, not with her) let’s ponder what this ceremony might actually be about. 

There are a number of unpleasant alternatives from which we might choose.

Is it the self-obsession of young people taken to its extreme? And I’m asking this with only the merest trace of irony as someone who blogs the interminable drivel of me me me.  

Is it about showing off, about being the kind of person who can’t do anything without announcing it to the world? Making some promises to myself in diary just wouldn’t be enough, it has to be formalised and witnessed.  Sadly most of her family weren’t able to attend “for logistical reasons”. You don’t say.

Is about being so desperate to be a bride that you just can’t wait any more? Just want to get that wedding dress, design the invites, choose the flowers?

Is about Verfremdung, about splitting yourself into parts? If you marry yourself, you must feel that you were separated before. That’s not a good way to be.

I’m sure the honeymoon would be great fun. But how would it be different from any other night on my own? Seducing myself wouldn’t be much of a challenge – I figure after all this time it’s a bit late to play hard to get. I’m sure I wouldn’t mind if I hadn’t shaved my legs, and I wouldn’t bother with the suspenders and all that jazz.

"I'd been essentially single for six years". Well, no shit. Having listened to this young woman on the radio, I have a sneaking suspicion that I know why she might be on her own. She sounded like a total pain in the arse. At least this way she won't get left on the shelf. 

Wonder whether she'll publish another article when she gets bored with herself and the nag nag nag of her inner voice, and has an affair? I can't wait.